The President's first official visit and size issues

In an effort to pour milk on the turbulent waters he had created in his feud with the Cats Intelligence Agency, President Bigly travelled to CIA headquarters to tell them he supported them yugely. Despite previously likening them to Nazi's he used the opportunity of standing before the memorial wall—dedicated to dead CIA personnel—to blame the dishonest press for the feud. He then went on to talk about himself in great detail, and also how his inauguration had been better attended than President Hendrix's.

During his self-absorbed disrespectful tirade he tirelessly returned to the size of his inauguration crowd, and how many Time Magazine covers he'd had, as well as disjointed rambling about nothing intelligence related, or the sacrifices that the personnel whose memorial he stood in front of had made.

Political commentator Salem Colpurr at CIA HQ:

"If there's one thing that comes over continuously it's that President Bigly has size issues. If he can't get past this then how is he going to handle diplomacy with other countries when he feels the slightest insult to his cathood.

"Looking around the crowd in front of the CIA memorial I can see cats jaws wide open in disbelief at the rambling speech just given. I did see that Beaverland is offering refuge to anyone who can prove they're a Democat not a Repurrican... sign me up eh?"

Later that day Doogie, the Power House Press Secretary, reiterated that President Bigly's inauguration crown was the largest ever to turn out. He also blasted the media for suggesting that the crowds were smaller than the previous inauguration four years earlier, and ranted that the photographs clearly showing the difference in numbers between President Hendrix's inauguration and President Bigly's were doctored.

Meanwhile, all around the world cats were marching in protest. The Mall in front of the Power House was turned into a sea of pink as cats of all gender identities gathered together to show their opposition to President Bigly and his misogynistic behaviour. With reports that the crowd was bigger than the inauguration the Power House was constantly shouting down the press; denying the figures were even close to the "record breaking crowds" of the previous day.

The world, however, was not fooled. Millions of cats marched against the new administration of hate. Even Beaverland, the country north of the United States of Purrica, sent buses of protesters festooned in pink to join rallies. Many didn't make it across the border as USP border enforcement agents had been ordered to refuse entry to anyone who may not be a Bigly supporter—in other words anyone without a bible, a gun, and a Make Purrica Great Again hat... and anyone wearing pink.

Later that day President Bigly was still chewing over the inauguration crowd size, "It was big, bigggest ever, bigger than Hendrix."