Inauguration Day +1

The morning after the inauguration President Bigly rose at dawn and repeated his morning mantra in the bathroom mirror, "You are a winner, everybody loves you, you are powerful."

After applying a double coat of lacquer to his fur combover, as he would be at the Cats Intelligence Agency (CIA) memorial later, he picked up his phone, knocked out a few disjointed flutters, and then joined the first family and sycophants for his usual breakfast of steak—well done.

"The crowds were yuge yesterday... bigger than any other inauguration in history," he said. The sycophants all agreed as they waited for him to throw scraps to them from the breakfast table.

As President Bigly continued with his meat and no veg breakfast he made a mental note to order the Power House organic garden turned into a putting green. Perhaps one of those crazy golf type things with holes in clown's mouths and little seesaw's for obstacles. Now that, he thought, would add some real class.

Meanwhile, in the Secret Service base of operations a crisis was underway. As there had been an almost unanimous protest against being forced to potentially take a bullet for the President, a lottery was underway. Each morning the agents who drew the short straws would be "it" for the day, with all that being "it" entailed.