Basking in the glory

Basking in the perceived glory of the previous nights speech to Congress, the Bigly administration decided the best course of action for today was to sit back and try to maximise any popularity points they might have gained. This also meant holding off on the new immigration order planned for today as it would be certain to incite Purricans anger. With the new president currently experiencing the worst honeymoon period in history it was felt he needed to squeeze every possible moment out of Tuesday's alleged triumph.

During the morning the news broke that the previous president and first cat had landed a book deal each, reported to be worth a cool $60 million. President Bigly digested this bit of news with the look of a cat trying to vomit up a furball. It appeared that Hendrix and Pepper were going to be in the public eye for a very long time to come; there was even a campaign and petition for Hendrix to stand in the Furench election. All this was a big problem for Bigly who wanted all the world's spotlight on him and him alone.

Calling his advisors into the Squircle Office Bigly said, "I want that book deal gone, dead, killed, nuked. Pickle's BFF at Creitfart lost his just before publication so kill this one now before it gets that far."

Doogie nodded his head vigorously while chewing manically and spraying bits of cat gob around the floor, "Yes, I'll cover it at my next press anti-briefing, fake news, discredit it, the press will go for it or they won't be invited to my next gaggle."

Bigly smiled at another power play tactic won—in his mind, "And get that organic garden dug up now!"

"Screetch, this morning the failing media is printing photos of you on the Squircle Office couch with your paws up on it, and behaving disrespectfully in front of the leaders from the black colleges and universities by taking selfies of yourself. Get some alternative facts out about the photo being fake."

"And what is this news that the Beaverland oilpatch is not promising undying fealty to me after I gave them the Furstone XL pipeline—with conditions favourable to Purrica. Tell the prime minister of Beaverland he complies or we take it anyway."

Watching his favourite news channel Ferret News, President Bigly almost choked on his saucer of milk when he saw that a memo to Power House staff had been leaked. The memo was instructing all staff not to destroy any information relating to the Bigly campaign, transition team, or administration collaboration with Borisland—before, during, and after the election. Working on the basis that if no-one else knows about it we can shred it first and ask forgiveness later, now the cat was out of the bag.

To cap it all a female TV celebrity—a real celebrity who did charitable things and personally donated money that hadn't previously been donated to her foundation—was not ruling out a run at the presidential role.

Bigly spat out his half-chewed steak, "Not happening, never, no more elections, the Bigly dynasty is in da house!"